DEAR MISS MANNERS: I heard this anecdote in college and a couple of times in the years since then: An applicant goes to a job interview. There is a piece of crumpled paper on the floor of the interviewer’s office, not far from a trash can. This a test: Anyone who doesn’t stop to pick up the trash and dispose of it will not be hired because they are careless.
I mentioned this to an older family member once. She said that she would have ignored any trash on the floor because the interviewer is essentially a host, and it would be rude for the applicant to correct their “mistake” of not cleaning it up.
GENTLE READER: While disapproving of traps disguised as hiring practices, Miss Manners does enjoy the test from a philosophical point of view.
Her choice would have been to ask if the interviewer would prefer the trash in the basket (avoiding any jokes about the interviewer having missed the target) and then proceed accordingly.
It would show initiative but also defer to the preferences of the employer — qualities that are desirable in a direct report. But this all being highly subjective is exactly why it should not be used as a hiring technique.
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DEAR MISS MANNERS: An issue I am repeatedly experiencing in both my professional and personal life is that when someone calls and I send them to voicemail (because I cannot take their call at the time), often the person hangs up and calls right back. Sometimes they do this several times in a row.
It is extremely frustrating. If I declined your call, it means I am not available to talk at the time. Hanging up and calling back won’t make me available; all it will do is interrupt what I am doing and make me frustrated.
In my profession, I do remote health assessments with patients. It is quite common for another patient to call when I am on the phone with someone else. I will send that call to voicemail, and then the person will hang up and call back. I have had people call back six or seven times in a row, interrupting the care I am attempting to give another patient.
It seems to be that many people today think that repeatedly calling is going to give them a better chance of reaching the person. This is a false assumption.
I beg you to get the word out to your readers: If someone cannot take your call, they can’t take your call. If you are sent to voicemail, leave a message and give it a rest. Maybe try back later. But please don’t be that rude person calling over and over to someone who is not available at the time.
GENTLE READER: Noted. Miss Manners is certain that you already thought of using technology to solve the problem — putting your phone on “Do Not Disturb” and so on.
But you also might remind your patients that if they think everything is an emergency, then nothing will be. It will not be as effective as just ignoring them, but at least it will have been said out loud.
