Dear Annie: My sister “Michelle” and I used to be close, but things changed after she had her second child. She rarely returns my calls and only texts if I reach out first. When we do talk, it’s always short, and she seems distracted or annoyed. I’ve offered to help with the kids or bring meals by, but she always says she’s “got it handled.”

Last month was my birthday. Michelle didn’t call or text, even though I saw her post online that day. I waited a few days before checking in. A few days later she reached out and apologized, saying she “meant to get around to it” but was swamped. I understand parenting is demanding, but I feel like I’m annoying her every time I reach out. I’ve asked if I did something wrong, and she insists everything is fine.

I don’t want to make it about me, but I also don’t want to keep chasing a relationship that feels one-sided. Should I confront her again or just accept that our relationship has changed for the worse? — Left Out Sister

Dear Left Out Sister: You probably shouldn’t expect her to be a very present friend at the moment, and that’s not because you did something wrong. It’s because she’s overwhelmed.

Keep the door open, but stop knocking so hard. Focus on other relationships right now. She will come to you when she’s ready.

Read more Dear Annie and other advice columns.

“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit Creators Publishing for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.

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